From "It" to "He"-- A Journey

Today was a great day at Bible study! Melissa (ZOE) and I are leading worship each week which has been fun. I planned out today's songlist and I even sang lead and let Melissa sing alto! It was fun to switch it around for a change.

The one thing I am finding is that there aren't many songs about the Holy Spirit in the C of C repertoire! This is not surprising considering no one I know ever heard sermons preached about the Spirit, either. I think we were all just too afraid to tackle the subject-- if we couldn't explain it, then we preferred to just leave it alone!

Anyway-- I have been on a quest to have a better comprehension of Him since my mid-20s... I am hoping this study challenges me in ways I have never thought about Him before.

Some points I liked from this week's lesson:

• 1 Corinthians 12:13- "we were all made to drink of one Spirit"; 1 Cor. 12:30- "All do not have gifts of healings, do they? All do not speak with tongues, do they? All do not interpret, do they?": Beth used these two verses to show that having the Spirit dwell in you does not equate to having the ability to speak in tongues, etc. Many often say that having the Holy Spirit requires this gift. Her point is that speaking in tongues may be a gift from the Spirit, but that not all of us will have this gift. "No matter how you feel about the gifts of the Spirit, the baptism of the Holy Spirit and speaking in tongues are not the same thing" (Moore, pg. 37). I think this is one of the major reasons we have shied away from teaching on the Spirit; We can't explain tongues, prophecy, and healing so we altogether ignore His gifts of wisdom, knowledge, and faith (vs. 7-9).
• John 16:7-11: 7 "But I tell you the truth, it is to your advantage that I go away; for if I do not go away, the Helper will not come to you; but if I go, I will send Him to you. 8 "And He, when He comes, will convict the world concerning sin and righteousness and judgment; 9 concerning sin, because they do not believe in Me; 10 and concerning righteousness, because I go to the Father and you no longer see Me; 11 and concerning judgment, because the ruler of this world has been judged. One of the ministries of the Spirit is to convict or reprove. Whenever we have felt the burden of reaching someone who is lost or correcting a believer from sin, we must remember this is not our job-- it is the Spirit's role. We can only be instruments used by Him in the process. No arguments we make or testimony we give is effective apart from the Spirit. The only power we have is intercessory prayer on his/her behalf.
• "The spiritual life will never come 'naturally'" (Moore, pg. 48). We have to make a deliberate choice to yield our spirits to Him each day. Surrender must be a daily choice.

Of course, there were many more challenging ideas this week. The best part is that it has me thinking about the Spirit and His role in my life.

The Spirit is slowly becoming less of an "It" and more of a "He" to me! Thank You, Lord!

Buy My Sister's Book! (shameless plug)

My Two Sisters: Nancy, Me, and baby sister Mary Kate.

Yes! My sister, Nancy has a new book coming out on October 9th. It is called A Red State of Mind: How a Catfish Queen Reject became a Liberty Belle. It is published by Time Warner Books. Visit the site to read an article about the book. Visit Amazon to pre-order now! Mary Matlin wrote a blurb for the cover and actually read and liked the book.

The book tells the adventure Nancy has had over the past several years living as a conservative in a land of liberals. It is a comedic take on her first-hand experience of being a conservative outcast while in New York and Philadelphia:

• Downtown Philadelphia was not the most welcoming place for a conservative during the year of the hotly contested Bush/Kerry 2004 Presidential campaign. As a mother of two, I pushed a double jogging stroller all over the City of Brotherly Love, which frequently put me right in the middle of some serious political tension. When I walked to church, voter registration activists urged pedestrians to "take back our country." When I shopped for groceries, pollsters stood at the doors mocking my stance on the war. When I got my haircut, it was under a gigantic sign that mocked the President. When I walked through parking lots, the bumpers of the Subarus explained that hate is not, evidently, a family value. When I visited my six year old's public school, the walls had signs up that read "America Hates George Bush Because He Lies." And the teachers even wore Kerry buttons.

So-- if you can't get a shameless plug from your sister, who can you?!?!

Seriously, Nancy is extremely talented and always has been. In high school she was loved by all-- well, except maybe her senior English teacher, Linda Montgomery--- that's a LONG story, but suffice it to say, if Nancy becomes a famous author, she'd definitely have the last laugh! (speaking of English, that is a very poorly constructed sentence!)

Visit her blog for many more amazing insights. You can also visit her website www.nancyfrench.com , but please note-- this is only a site that I put up for her several years back before she was famous-- her "official" site is almost ready and will be launched soon at the same address.

There is also some "Church of Christ" humor in the book! In what other Time Warner book are you going to find that!?!

Nancy lives in Columbia, TN, now with her husband David and her precious kids Camille and Austin. David is a Harvard law grad specializing in constitutional law. He works for the Alliance Defense Fund and has defended the rights of Christians on college campuses all over the country-- including several landmark cases like the one at Tufts. He is amazingly talented, too, and is an author in his own right-- four books, including A Season for Justice: Defending the Rights of the Christian Home, Church, and School, and numerous op-eds. Read his latest article on the National Review.

He spent this past week at the White House meeting with Dick Cheney and Karl Rove! Both he and Nancy are politically involved-- with some big name future presidential candidate-- more on that later-- when he actually announces he's running!

Yes-- this is my family! We're a talented bunch?!? Did I tell you that my dad is a wood worker and has made most of the family articles of furniture like beds, desks, bookshelves?!?

Living Beyond Myself

I am so thankful that I have started a Bible study. I have just completed the first week of Beth Moore's new study, Living Beyond Yourself. It is based on the fruits of the Spirit found in Galatians chapter 5. This will be my 5th Beth study.

There is something about being in an organized study that I just LOVE! I need the accountability and the discipline that a group study brings, plus I also thrive on the discussion times. I am fascinated by how others view Scripture, and I love to hear all the different perspectives.

I am always amazed at how Beth comes up with her ideas. She really has a depth to her teaching that resonates with me. Today she talked about how we were created to be filled-- this is from God, and it can be extremely rewarding as long as we allow Him to fill us up with His Spirit. But, if we allow this need to be filled to become driven by the flesh, it can be totally destructive. We begin searching for anyone or anything to cling to in order to fill the void in our souls. Isn't this SO true?!

When I think back to the times in my life when I was most out of control as far as sin and "self", I can now see that it was all just a desperate attempt to be needed or to feel love-- to fill up the empty places in my heart.

She also believes that America has never been more empty and desperate. She alluded to Proverbs 13:12 as a possible explanation:

Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a longing fulfilled is a tree of life.

She suggests that we have never been surrounded by more "stuff". We live in such a materialistic society and in a culture that tells us to look to all sorts of things to find happiness and fulfillment. We place our hope on the "next new thing" to come along, praying that we will finally find the answers and peace we have been searching for.... But, it never happens-- at least no longer than a small amount of time.... Then, we're off again, looking for our next fix.

Nothing we grasp onto brings us what we ultimately want and need-- It is simply "hope deferred," and it leaves our hearts sick. Yes, that seems to be an apt description for all of us.

Instead, God calls us to something so much more than that! He offers us His Spirit! He wants us to be filled to overflowing with Him! NOTHING that our flesh desires or tries to offer us can compare to what God has promised us.

No eye has seen, no ear has heard, no mind has conceived what God has prepared for those who love him" but God has revealed it to us by his Spirit. 1 Corinthians 2:9,10

Praise be to Him! I want more than I can "ask or imagine" from this life.

I also LOVED her insight on the "FRUITS" of the Spirit. She adds that of course they are called fruits-- They exist in our lives so that others may get their first "taste" of the Lord, so that they can taste to see that He is good. Being filled with His Spirit places us in a wonderful position of ministry. Our Spirit-filled lives drive us to share this abundant life with all we meet!

He has made us competent as ministers of a new covenant - not of the letter but of the Spirit; for the letter kills, but the Spirit gives life. 2 Corinthians 3:6

So-- I am just excited to have a renewed joy for the Word! I have allowed myself to get way too busy and have neglected meaningful study for too many months now.

I feel so blessed to have the opportunity to take part in this and to be challenged by His Word.

I'll keep you posted on any cool insights I gain along the way!

OC Consignment Sale 2006

I'm Ba-a-a-a-a-ck! :)

Yes-- I am ashamed to admit that it has been a month since my last post! Every spare moment that I had went toward the Otter Creek Consignment Sale. And, I am proud to say that it was a grand success! In two days we sold over $18,000 and our playground fund kept half of that.

We really had no concept of how much we could make-- I think we were all shocked that we raised so much. Everyone who came to the sale complimented us on how well-organized it was and how neatly the items were displayed. Over 100 volunteers helped to make it such a success-- it could not have happened without their hard work! :)

So-- Luke has started pre-school at Otter Creek. He is in Miss Betsy's class, and he loves it! We are so happy that he is in school there.

Here are some pics of our life over the last month:






Luke with his teacher, Miss Betsy.


Caroline is SIX months-old! :)




She is proving to be a good eater like her brother.


Big Brother and Little Sis! Favorite thing: Luke will put his arms around Caroline and say, "Oh-- she's so sweet!" :)

New ZOE Blog

Just thought some of you out there in Blog land might be interested to know that there is now a ZOE Group Blog . Please add it to your list of blogs that you visit frequently and pass it along! Feel free to link it from your sites as well.

This is a blog I started that will attempt to stay current with all things ZOE-- CD recordings, conferences, trips, thoughts about the ministry, stories we hear along the way, etc....

I have invited all involved in the ZOE ministry to be team members, so ideally they will add their own unique posts as well.

http://zoegroup.blogspot.com

Wrap It Up!

Well-- As of Thursday night, our CD project for 2006 is finished! The title of the CD will be Closer which ties in with the theme of our conference this year. As Larry Bridgesmith put it: "Being Closer to God is the desire of our hearts and the longing of our souls. The intimacy we seek in many inappropriate places can in truth only be found in the God of heaven and earth." Conference registration is now open! You can sign up online. Hope to see you all there!

The CD turned out great! The whole experience was so nice. Randy was such a pro, and did such a wonderful job directing us. Our producer Chris is also so talented. The songs are fantastic! Bottom line-- it was a smooth as a studio production could have gone. God was definitely with us! We pray that lives will be touched by the beautiful words and melodies of these precious hymns to our Father.


Peter and Philip show off those low bass notes! Apparently the "face" helps in reaching them!


Sheryl and Melissa-- our wonderful sopranos. Sheryl is eating Pringles-- no ZOE recording is complete without cans and cans of those!


Philip and David-- A good tenor is hard to find, and we have TWO! :)


The ZOE Girls! What a blessing to have sung with these gals for 10 years.


Randy goes over some final details before we listen to the playback of the final song.

Heart, Head, and Microphones

Tonight ZOE heads into the studio to start work on our 10th project!! It is so hard to believe that we have been together for so long. With a few exceptions, most of us have been singing the entire time. We have been through the good and the bad-- births, deaths, marriage, etc.-- we're truly family.

This CD should be a little different than previous offerings. First of all, Brandon is still on hiatus, so Peter will be taking on the lead. He has a great voice. We do miss Brandon though! :) Second, this CD will have more of a hymn-like quality. If you have been blessed to hear Randy do his talk on "Worship Through the Ages", then you know all about the pendulum shift which is constantly occurring between "heart and head." Well-- the trend in worship music seems to be heading back toward weighty, meaningful (head) lyrics rather than more repetitive praise music (heart). Think "In Christ Alone" instead of "A New Anointing." Hopefully this project will be some type of transitional bridge between the two... some classic hymns with a twist plus some new songs with a classic feel.

So-- we'll be in the studio all week. We covet your prayers! As always, the music is always bigger than any of us because it speaks to the nature of God. We just pray that he continues to work through this ministry in spite of us.

My one worry is that Caroline will HAVE to take a bottle since I will be away longer than 3 or 4 hours. She should do this rather easily, but you never know. I still have flashbacks to when Luke was 3 months-old, we were recording, and my parents were watching him. They called saying that he was crying, wouldn't take a bottle, and they didn't know what to do! As a NEW mom, I was traumatized and so upset! I couldn't leave, Scott was out of town, and I had no idea what to do to remedy the situation! There was nothing I could do. I am in the same position now, except that Caroline has done a better job taking an emergency bottle when necessary. Scott will be in town tonight and Friday, but my parents are watching the kids Tuesday-Thursday. Prayers welcome! :)

What a blessing ZOE has been to me! I have often written on this blog about how special the people and the ministry are to me, so I will spare you now. Thanks to all of you who continue to support us and encourage us. I have had conversations on three different occasions during the last several weeks with people who have been kind enough to share the ways their lives have been touched by ZOE. It is so humbling to come face to face with God at work in something that you have been blessed to participate in... We will all be on our knees tonight as we think about these people and stories before we step in front of those mics.

Happy 4th!

Hope you all had a wonderful 4th with family and friends!

Our Little Beach Bums

Summertime, Summertime, Sum-Sum-Summertime!

Well, the summer is flying by! Tons of stuff going on-- always something to do or somewhere to be.... Days are spent in a comfortable routine of going to the Y and then usually some pool time before lunch and the afternoon nap.

I have really been working out harder than ever! I am enjoying it! Kickboxing is the best, and I just ordered some pink gloves which should make class even more fun!

The kids are great! Luke has definitely hit the beginnings of the "terrible twos"-- at least "terrible" compared to his formerly semi-perfect behavior status. Everything now is "My do! My do!" from Mr. Independent. He is also testing his boundaries when it comes to obedience.

I am almost finished with book by Tedd Trip called Shepherding a Child's Heart. I feel like he has some wonderful things to say about Biblical parenting. We are also in a parenting class at church taught by a great Christian women based out of her many years of experience as the principal of David Lipscomb Elementary. Yes, each week the information sometimes contradicts and conflicts, but I assume that parenting is just like everything else... You glean bits of wisdom where you can, decide what works, and then pray a lot! :) For some reason, I doubt my parents analyzed their particular parenting style, and I seemed to turn out ok-- I think!?!

For all you ZOE fans-- we are hitting the recording studios in a week or two. This is our 10th year! Hard to believe. This year's project should be a tad different than the others. We are trying to pull together a type of "hymns" collection-- some old, some new, some old with a twist.
The worship pendulum is starting to swing back toward songs with deeper lyrics-- more hymn-like, less praise-like. So, we are hoping to use this CD as a type of transitional bridge between the two. There are some really solid songs. Pray for us!

Here are the kiddos!

Can you believe-- Caroline is now 4 months-old!?
She is always happy and good as gold!

She's now 14 pounds and 1 ounce.
Just perfect, we're proud to announce!

"A Little Luke" is what everyone keeps saying...
He was so good, so we keep praying!

See the photos of him at her age.
Similar? We'll let you all gauge!

Oh, How the Years Go By....

Scott and I celebrated our 11th anniversary yesterday! We went to our favorite spot to dine in Nashville-- Fleming's. We have commemorated all the major events of our life there for the past several years.... anniversaries, pregnancies, Valentine's Day...

I pulled out our wedding and honeymoon videos and made Luke watch! He wasn't too interested! :) The one thing that made me cringe was when it hit me that I have officially become one of "those people" who remark about how skinny I looked in my dress and how I would never be able to fit into it again! YIKES! We looked SO young and naive! It is hard to accept that we are OLD now!!! :)

Last night was very special... We had a great discussion over dinner about our marriage and our relationship. It has changed so much since the arrival of our kids. That is inevitable, I'm sure. Scott and I were blessed to spend the first nine years of marriage "playing" and traveling around the world. Nobody had more fun than we did! It truly was a perfect life! We were best friends and couldn't have asked for anything more.

I always used to marvel when people would talk about marriage being "work"-- I could never relate, because the relationship Scott and I had was far from work. Well-- I think I have reached a point after 11 years where I am beginning to understand what it means. "Work" might not be the exact word I would use-- maybe "effort" would be better. It takes effort to stay on track now.

I never thought twice before kids about making the time to talk to Scott about my thoughts and dreams and feelings. Now I find myself thinking that I should, but then I get too busy, or I'm too tired to bring things up. He is still my best friend-- no doubt-- but, it is so easy to fall into the trap of two people living under the same roof if you aren't constantly aware of communicating with one another.

We talked about that and many other things. It was nice to reconnect and recommit to one another. We feel very blessed to still be so in love and genuinely happy after 14 years together-- dating and marriage. God has been faithful to us, and we look forward to many years ahead.

Mile-High Ministry

The ZOE Girls!! Emily, Karin, Me, & Melissa.

Emily is officially one of the gang now! She's so fun! She sang with us at Pepperdine, too.

What a great weekend in Denver! I learned that I can pull off soprano reasonably well, but it isn't half as fun as harmonizing! Altos rule! Melissa was great putting up with me though!

The people at Arvada church couldn't have been nicer. That is the best thing about being blessed to a part of ZOE-- meeting Christian brothers and sisters from coast to coast. It gives you a much bigger sense of the "church of Christ."

Caroline was an angel. She slept on both legs of the flight. She was happy and amenable the whole weekend and was passed around to anyone who wanted to hold her. I don't think she fussed more than 5 minutes all weekend. She is so good-natured! Another blessing! Scott was great, too, and spent much of the time holding her-- which I think he enjoyed. Another blessing!

On the way to Denver...

On the way to Denver in the morning for a ZOE conference at the Arvada Church. It should be a fun weekend! I am actually singing soprano this weekend! YIKES! That should be fun, too! I am still getting over my sinus issues that I've had for over two weeks, so I am praying that my voice will hold up and sound decent! Good thing Brandon is still on hiatus-- he'd probably have a heart attack! :)

We shipped Luke back to my parents today to stay while we're gone. He has so much fun at Pa Bob and Ma Betz's house. We had been to visit them last weekend along with both my sisters and the cousins, Camille and Austin. Luke had a blast with them, and they are still up there, so I'm sure he won't even notice we're gone.

Ran into my high school boyfriend-- Lance-- while we were at my parents. I dated him all through high school and the first semester of college at Lipscomb. I even attended his wedding after we broke up. Well, he got divorced in December after 13 years of marriage! So sad to see him act as if it was the best thing that ever happened to him-- especially right in front of his 7 year-old daughter! She even commented at one point that "mom and dad fought a lot!" She seemed so nonchalant about it all. It just struck me as such a tragic situation. I asked him what had happened, and he said they had just grown apart. He said he had been traveling a good deal. Lord, please protect our marriages! They are so precious and fragile in so many ways!

Our friends Kevin and Lana had their baby boy yesterday, and we went to visit them tonight. Caroline looked like she was fixing to graduate high school compared to him! Which is funny since she was the same size as he was just 3 months ago. Boy does time fly by--- they just grow up way too fast! She is just perfect! Thank you, Lord, for our little miracle!

That's What It's All about!?

Saw this exact bumper sticker as we were driving home from the Y this morning-- It made me laugh, and I had to pass it along!

And as a side note-- I just couldn't resist! :)

There was a great loss recently in the entertainment world. Larry LaPrise, the Detroit native who wrote the song "Hokey Pokey," died last week at 83.

It was especially difficult for the family to keep him in the casket. They'd put his left leg in and... well, you know the rest.

Busy Bee

If ants are such busy workers, then how do they find time to go to all the picnics?!




Busy seems to be a word that pops into my vocabulary much too frequently! I have reached a point where saying, "I'm so busy," just seems so ridiculous. For some reason, it can too easily become a catch-all phrase to rationalize everything that goes unaccomplished in our lives-- "sorry I didn't call... I've been so busy"; "I didn't get to that yet-- I've been so busy!"; "sorry we didn't make it, we were just so busy!"

Everyone is busy these days. We are all over-committed, tired, and running crazy. That's life-- unfortunately! Keeping a full plate has been the way I have always operated, so I am ashamed to say that I am used to this way of living. Thankfully, I am blessed to have plenty of stretches where life is calm and peaceful-- but, those don't last too long before I have put myself back into "busy mode."

Why? I have this overwhelming need to be "useful" and "needed." Somewhere in my crazy mind, I guess if I am busy then those needs are met-- "I must be valuable because I always have things to do." And, since this is part of my "reward" for staying busy, I actually enjoy it-- no matter how crazy it gets! I need help, huh?! :)

So-- my latest task to undertake is running a consignment sale at church! I am VERY excited about it even though it is going to be a ton of work. I am also working with a great bunch of people to help pull it off. All the proceeds will go toward building a new playground at our new location. I designed the entire web site in one "busy" afternoon! Check it out and get involved if you're near! www.ottercreeksale.com

Mother's Day was great this year! So hard to believe I have two kiddos! They are truly a blessing and joy! They are probably the only "legitimate" item on my busy list!

Sweet Baby James

Last night Scott and I went to see our beloved James Taylor at the Ryman. JT has been our favorite ever since we first started dating. Scott made me a tape (yes, it was a LONG time before recording to CDs was available-- way back in the dark ages of 1992!) that had "How Sweet It Is to Be Loved By You" and "You've Got a Friend" on it. I was hooked-- on Scott and on JT!

We went to see him in concert soon afterwards and have continued to go hear him every time he comes to Nashville. Last night was our first time to hear him at the Ryman. It was REALLY great! That place is so intimate. It felt like we were sitting in his living room just listening to him play and talk about the amazing songs he has written over the years. It was just him, his guitar, and a piano player--- a very stripped down, unplugged, acoustic-type performance... very real and honest. He showed photos that corresponded to the songs and told great behind the scenes stories on a variety of things about his life and work. It was SO good!

So-- Last night, as I sat listening to him, I felt such gratitude toward him for unknowingly helping to write a soundtrack for my life. I even call Scott "James"-- a nickname that goes back to our first months of dating which I derived from his song "Sweet Baby James" that we both love.

This is the second time I have blogged about going to a JT concert. We went last summer to see him, and I wrote about it in an August 2005 posting :

Scott and I went to a James Taylor concert Sunday night. What a place to people watch! We had grass seats. As I looked around at the sea of young-- and old-- lovebirds, it struck me just how much time had gone by since Scott and I first went to see James Taylor in 1992. We had only been dating a month-- our relationship was so new! We were SO "in love"! We reveled in the summer night and had no clue what the years ahead had in store for us!

He has so many songs that have meant so much to me and Scott, and now, to our family-- I used several of his songs in the two DVDs I have made documenting Luke's first two years ("Whenever I See Your Smiling Face", "Getting to Know You"). I had actually thought about naming Luke "James", but a couple in our lifegroup already has a little boy with the name. Ironically though, I found out that JT's current wife is named Caroline! He even wrote a song for her on his October Road CD called Caroline, I See You. Crazy!

Anyway-- his voice is magic. I am so thankful that he was given a venue in this life to use his gifts and creativity. It has been special to us.

How Time Flies...

Right before our eyes.... What a miracle!

Pepperdine 2006

We had a great time in Pepperdine last week! The kids did so well! They slept all the way out on the plane and back! They did a wonderful job adjusting to the time change, too. All in all, it was a very pleasant time. It is so nice seeing people from year to year and hearing such incredible speakers/thinkers.

I went to several talks on the "post modern" church. It is an interesting topic to me. Rubel did a class on the subject that was truly fabulous! I miss hearing him each Sunday SO much! Listening to him again made me realize how much... One day I was standing in the back of his session holding Caroline and I got teary-eyed just thinking how sad it was that she would never grow up hearing him speak. He would just be some preacher that Scott and I always reminisced about-- just like my parents do about Batsell Barrett Baxter and Ira North!

A beautiful day out by the fountain!

Luke and Caroline had a great time in Malibu! Last year Luke was barely walking while this year he was all over the place! He had a great time playing with all the kids at the child care area each day during the morning sessions. He is such a big boy! Next year Caroline will be walking! Time flies!

Caroline and Daddy!

Having fun on the beach! Caroline's first trip to the ocean!

Luke loves his little sister!

What a sweetie! Luke is such a joy! :)

Getting Real-- Growing Relationships

Tomorrow we head to Pepperdine. I am running around today trying to make sure we have everything we need packed up and ready to go! It's astounding how many "accessories" you have to bring for the kids!

I just had to take a moment to document the most amazing weekend! Our small group had a retreat this weekend, and I am still overwhelmed with what a great experience it was. This is a group of 5 couples-- we all went to Lipscomb together except for one couple who moved here a few years ago. We officially began meeting together as a group last summer.

It was easy for all of us to join the group-- we all went to church together, most of us had known each other well over a decade... We had been in studies together before and had been friends for a long time. But, in forming this group this time around, we all decided we wanted more than just a social circle-- we wanted a genuine family of people who we could be real with, share our hearts and secrets with-- people who would hold us accountable and challenge us spiritually.

We decided to meet every Sunday, and things began as most small groups do. We tackled Eldredge's Waking the Dead. It was a great book, and we had nice discussions on trying to live a life for the Lord "fully alive" and aware that Satan wanted to keep us in the dark to the abundant life God has called us to live. We did a pretty good job of staying on track for the most part, but sometimes it got hard to stay organized and to meet every week. We all have busy schedules and many things going on. In spite of the occasional lapses, we all pledged our commitment to the group and forged on.

During this time, Scott and I had left Woodmont and had begun attending Otter Creek. Another one of the couples had left Woodmont and joined another local Church of Christ. The other three couples were on "church tours" of sorts, trying to find a place that felt right (I was hoping they would land at OC with us!). Well, the other three couples did start coming to OC and I am praying that they join in the near future! Yeah!

Also during this time I was put on bed rest, and three of the girls were also pregnant! I safely delivered Caroline, but a few weeks later one of the girls suffered a tragic miscarriage. Then, a few weeks later the last girl in our group announced she was also pregnant! So, there was much happening within the group-- a complete range of emotions and experiences that we were all sharing. House building, moving, and selling was also in the mix.

At one meeting in March, we decided that we all needed to refocus. We had finished the book and we needed to decide where we were headed next. We also needed to re-examine our commitment to the group and what are visions were for it. We decided then and there that we needed to get away one weekend without the kids and have a little retreat. We picked a date and vowed to make it happen!

Well-- this past Saturday it became a reality, and it was honestly like no other retreat I have ever been a part of. I had given each couple a list of questions to answer-- both individually and as a couple (see end of post). These questions were a way for us to share our pasts and our life experiences with one another. I never realized what a truly amazing time would result from it.

Each couple had a chance to talk and share life stories. There was no time limit and no agenda. We just listened and shared. It was really beautiful, and although we "knew" each other, we learned so many things that we would never have known without this precious time. Secrets were revealed and walls were torn down, both between the couples themselves and between all of us. It was wonderful to begin to see how very similar our struggles were and also how very different each of our lives had been. There was family disfunction, abuse, rebellion, intimacy issues as well as wonderful memories, embarrassing moments, and many "remember whens".

We finally shut things down around 3 am! The next morning we had a terrific time of worship and communion with one another! The weekend was just so wonderful! Every person should be so blessed to be a part of such a family! We plan on being there for each other through thick and thin-- good and bad! Our main goal is to be real with each other so that we can help each other be real with God. This is where genuine relationships must begin-- taking off the masks, acknowledging our quirks and flaws, and revealing our deepest desires and needs. This weekend we laid a great foundation for this to happen.

Thank you, Lord, for friends who become family!
------------

When were you born? Where?Any interesting circumstances?

Do you have brothers/sisters?

Describe the relationships within your family? Were you close to one another? How have things changed over the years?

What did you admire about your parents? What would you have changed?

How was “faith” and belief in God handled in your home?

How did you handle your own personal faith during your teen/high school years? In college? What were your beliefs? Did you attend church? Why—why not?

Where do you see yourself now as far as your faith? How would you describe your relationship with God? What are you still searching for, if anything? What things have you discovered and learned about God?

How did you meet? How long did it take for you to know that it was “real love”?

Describe your dating relationship? Was it healthy? Did you fight a lot? Break up? Did your faith play any role in the way you related to each other?

How long did you date before you got engaged? How did you get engaged?

Describe your wedding? Any fun stories? What would you change about it now looking back, if anything? What was the best thing about that day?

Describe your honeymoon— where did you go? What did you do? How long were you away? Fun moments?

What was the biggest adjustment for you to make once you were married? Did anything surprise you about what it would be like to be married?

What was your first “big fight” about? How did you resolve it?

Describe your “fight” personalities—how do you fight? Who is aggressive? Passive? Calm? Erratic? Violent? Silent treatment?

What do you fight about the most? Why do you think this is the case?

What is the biggest trial you have faced as a married couple? What helped you get through it together?

How has having children changed your relationship? What is your favorite part about being parents?

Do you agree on how to discipline your kids? Is one of you the “bad guy”? Where do you think your weakness is in this area? Your strengths?

How have you developed your faith together as a couple? Do you talk about your relationship with God together? Do you pray together? Study together? If not, why?

What legacy do you want to leave for your family? What are some things in your marriage that you have tried not to incorporate based upon your parents’ relationship and the example they set for you? What are some things that you have tried to establish as new traditions for your family? What do you want your children to inherit from you as far as relationships go?