Falling leaves, Melting snow

tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7237383.post-75627095674330066702008-01-08T00:12:00.000-06:002008-01-08T00:50:04.181-06:00Falling leaves, Melting snowGot an email today that revealed the news that Marcy Hayes had passed after a long battle with cervical cancer. I have posted about her recently-- she was only 32 years-old and a mother of two precious boys, ages 7 and 1. Can't really explain in words how this news impacts me-- and, it almost seems like it is inappropriate to even try when it is not me who will bear this heavy burden, but it will be her two sons and Mark. Mark is such a magnetic guy. I was blessed to know him at least 10 years ago when we both attended Woodmont Hills. I still think he is one of the best story tellers I have ever heard. He is like a giant teddy bear-- he would just come up and hug on you-- he makes you feel like you really matter to him. Everyone loves him. He would eventually become a "pseudo-youth minister" at Woodmont, and Scott and I worked with him closely during that time with the youth group. Marcy was this "granola"-type girl-- very healthy and no-fuss about her. She was into "hot yoga". She would give Hank veggie sticks and closely monitored what he ate. She was honest and straight-forward-- you knew where you stood with her. She was so sincere and passionate about her faith. She was welcoming and friendly. She and Mark were such a great couple. Can't believe she's gone. She was younger than me. My heart just breaks for Mark and the boys. So, my mind has just been reeling-- thinking about how life is really just a blur. Even this wonderful holiday season which is only just now coming to a close is starting to seem like a distant memory. Why is life like that? Why is it so hard to stay "in the moment" and not to forget what things felt like and the looks on people's faces and the laughter we shared. Yes, we retain bits and pieces, but the majority of it just gets washed up in the ocean of time and waves of other memories who have gone before. I remember times laughing with Marcy. I remember talking about her philosophy on parenting and discussing with her how she handled Hank in certain situations. I remember fun times at her house and all-night slumber parties with the teen girls at church. I remember the time we went to the Y together to a class and she complained that it wasn't hard enough for her. I remember her deep concern for a family she knew who had a son who was ill and how she always reminded us to pray for them..... Bits and pieces of her-- moments that have come and gone. I can't imagine what Mark is pondering now-- and all the things he is remembering about her. What will Hank and Isaac remember? It is just sad-- really sad to me right now. The worst part is that I feel like I was absolutely no help to Mark during all of this. I didn't know how to help or what to say so I did nothing. I am so sorry for that. Even though he assured everyone that there was nothing we could do-- it still seems wrong. And now, I will sit at her memorial service and mourn with so many others. I will look around and see many familiar faces who also shared those times with me, and we will embrace and talk about the way things used to be and how sad it is that we have lost touch and how great Marcy was and how sad we are for Mark and the boys.... Life is just overwhelming at times. I guess there is some kind of meaning and purpose for people who come into our lives for only a season and then are gone-- like leaves falling of trees in the winter and snow melting in the sun. Without the impact that they make on us-- even however brief-- but for just a moment-- we could never experience the growth and renewal we gain in the "spring" of our lives. And so, they touch us and move on and we move on-- we change houses, change cities, change churches, change friends.... the "circle of life and friendship".... I guess that is why life-long friends truly are unique. It is only a rare few who actually remain in our lives and never drift away. Those who are always in our memories and who continue to make new ones with us. Just last week I was blessed to spend time with my life-long friend. She has lived far away from me now for several years and we don't even talk that often, but the minute we do reunite, it always comes back. It is special and familiar. We can share the good and bad and simply "be" with each other. I am thankful that Marcy and I crossed paths and shared many wonderful times together on this side of heaven. She was a life-long friend to so many, and she will be deeply missed. Here are some words that Mark sent us just one day after she left this place: After a three year battle with cervical cancer, Marcy Rae Hayes died yesterday in our home in Thompson's Station. She was 32 years old. Marcy was an amazing wife and an incredible mother to Hank (7) and Isaac (1). She didn't compromise in her faith or belief in the Father, and I believe she is with Him now. She loved us boys with everything she had, but I don't think she would return here even if she had the chance. We don't understand living our lives without her, but we believe that God is good and faithful, and His grace, mercy and love are new to us every day. We don't know what the future looks like, but we know our God does, and we will count on Him to sustain us. So many of you have loved us and helped us endure this incredibly tough time. We don't know what we would have done without you. Thank you for allowing Jesus to use you. Sweetly broken and surrendered, Mark Yes, we are all "broken and surrendered." May God send you His peace and comfort, Mark. May He remind us to treasure each moment and make the most of every breath we are blessed to experience here and to do it all to His glory.Amy Westermanhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/16044475083219864329noreply@blogger.com